Guys and Traditional Maleness

11 07 2013

frank_sinatra_2Some time ago, my wife and I had a compelling conversation over eggplant parmigiana:

Alpha males.

The term alpha male is a recent innovation, but the idea is well-known.  Like Justice Potter Stewart’s answer when asked to describe obscenity, he answered, “I can’t tell you what obscenity is but I know it when I see it.”  You know an alpha male when you see him.

Popular culture has given us worthy exemplars of the alpha male.  Steve McQueen.  John Wayne.  Clint Eastwood.  Frank Sinatra (pictured above).  All are established icons of time-honored maleness.  They were guys.   More recently, Liam Neeson and Russell Crowe.

When I asked Kath what defines an alpha male more than anything, she answered, “Confidence.  He’s comfortable with himself and owns his space.”

That really got my attention, coming from someone I know better than anyone on earth, a gal who doesn’t fail to speak her mind candidly.

An alpha male:

  • Is confident in his own abilities.  One proof is he doesn’t need to announce it.  He knows what he can and cannot do.
  • Is decisive.  He makes a decision, usually with dispatch, and then sticks with it.
  • Has drive and a spine–testosterone and iron will.
  • Doesn’t run for shelter and sympathy when the going gets tough.
  • Is not given to self-pity, especially displays of it.  Corollary to that is he doesn’t shift blame and takes a beating if he’s earned it.
  • Can defend himself intellectually or physically.  This makes women feel very safe and is quite a turn-on.
  • Will mask his fears even when afraid.  It’s Leadership 101.  Combat veterans understand this well.
  • Is not a poser.  Nor is he arrogant (an advertisement saying “I’m insecure”).
  • Walks into a room and leads.  He’s not looking for a leader.  He is one.  Frank Sinatra was king here.  It’s no wonder one of his nicknames was “Chairman of the Board.”
  • Aren’t desperately seeking people’s approval or permission to live life and forge ahead.
  • Is not metrosexual, though he dresses well and smells nice.  The idea of effeminacy makes him recoil.
  • Knows exactly what he wants and goes after it, come hell or high water.

The world awaits a tidal wave of return to traditional maleness–leadership, passion, decisiveness, direction and purpose.

So does your family.

And so does your woman.

Image Credit




3 responses

11 07 2013
David Kanigan


11 07 2013
Christian Fahey

Thanks, David. This stuff stirs my blood as I know it does yours!

11 07 2013
David Kanigan

It does Christian. It does.

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